The Genie and the Magic Mirror


(Cheers and applause from the audience as Jerry's first guest, Davie, walks on stage, smiling and waving)

Jerry Sorcerer: So tell us how you came to encounter this "magic mirror" that you speak of, and what happened when you found it.

Davie: Okay! Well, my father had just died and left his wood-cutting business to me. I was walking through the woods one day when I saw this snake and an elephant fighting. I watched from up in a tree for a while, and eventually the snake ended up swallowing the elephant. He almost had the entire sucker down, but the tusks were sticking out so he couldn't swallow him whole. That's when I came up to offer my help. The elephant said he'd give me whatever I wanted if I killed the snake, but it looked a lot easier to just chop off the elephant's tusks so the snake could finish his meal... so that's what I did.

(The audience boos, several people shout angry things at him)

Davie: What?! What... I know I felt bad for the dude but I mean the snake had to eat too! Anyway, just shut up and let me tell my story! So after I helped the snake, he turned into a human and told me to come with him to his mom's house. His mom tried to give me all this food and liquor to thank me for saving her son's life, but what really caught my eye was this piece of broken mirror lying outside by the gate, so I asked for that instead. She seemed kind of hesitant to give it up, but my new snake dude friend finally convinced her. I said my goodbyes and started back home. As I was walking, I took at the mirror and began turning it over to examine it, when out of nowhere this genie pops out and says "Your command, my Sultan?"

genie
Green Genie

I was really freaking confused so I just yelled out something about burgers and, right before my eyes, appears every single kind of yummy delicious-looking burger I have ever seen in my life, and the genie disappeared.
(The audience ooohs and ahhhs)

Jerry: Haha, Davie, that's so crazy, I hardly believe it.

Davie: Well, Jerry, it's no lie. You can ask my girl later. I know a ton of other people who will vouch for me too. So anyway, like I was saying, I ate my fill of the burgers, and turned the mirror fragment over again. Lo and behold, out pops the genie. This time I had bigger plans in mind. I asked for the biggest helluva palace you've ever seen... and it springs up out of nowhere! Totally sweet. And what kind of palace is complete without a smokin' hot princess? Shout out to my girl: Love you! So after that, I was set for quite some time. One day, this old lady came creeping around, and I thought she looked like she had been through a rough time, so I hired her on as a servant. A month or two after the appearance of this lady, I went on a camping trip with some buds of mine a few forests down. I come back to find my palace in flames; everything I ever loved was gone, including my wife, and the magic mirror. The only thing that which left me was my pet cat, Gary.
(Gasps from the audience)

Jerry: Oh jeez, it was that old woman, wasn't it?

Davie: Yeah, turns out she was working for my wife's father. She was sent to find her. But I traveled along throughout Turkey for about a year, looking for my girl and my mirror. Nothing could take me away from my girl. Finally I found her father's palace. I snuck in, never letting her father see me, pretended to be a cook looking for hire, and found my wife. Boy, was she glad to see me. We eventually devised a plan to get Gary to sneak into the old woman's living quarters to steal my mirror back. After about three weeks of us sneaking around, we finally had the mirror back! And you know what I did when I got it back? Well, I asked the genie to make me look like a fearsome warrior and give me an army of thousands. Then I knocked on my wife's father's palace door, and told I wanted to go to war, unless he would give me his daughter's hand in marriage. Of course, he obliged, and along with that, he gave me his palace and control of the entire city! I made the genie exile the sneaky old woman forever, and my wife and I now live happily.

Jerry: Wow, Davie! What an incredible story! Now, what if I were to tell you that the old woman wasn't actually an old woman, but a witch in disguise?

Davie: God, who cares. As long as I don't ever have to see her again. I swear if I did... ooooh man. It would not be good.

Jerry: Not good, huh? What if I were to tell you that her name is Emily, and we have her waiting backstage?
(Audience begins to shout and jeer)

Davie: What?! Bring that witch out here! Let me give her a piece of my mind!

Jerry: Well actually, Davie, Emily's got a story of her own to tell too...

The Magic Bobby Pins




Author's note: This is a greatly condensed version of the original story. In the original, after his father's death, the young man is warned never to chop down the tree that stands on the edge of the forest. He goes to chop it down anyway, and it runs away from him. He follows it for days and nights, and that is how he comes across the snake and the elephant fighting. Also, in the original, when Davie (he is not given a name in the original) asks for a wife, he is thinking about the daughter of a certain Padishah (a Padishah is like a Sultan, or a king), and when that daughter is taken away from the Padishah, he sends out a search party. When she still cannot be found, he hires this old woman who promises she can help. The old woman than finds the Padishah's daughter and befriends her. She convinces the daughter to procure the magic mirror from Davie, and then she steals it and returns the daughter to her father. When Davie comes to find her, she discovers him and sends him back. Davie then befriends the King  (or Padishah)  of all the mice (because animals can talk in these Turkish fairy tales), and the mouse is actually the one who steals the mirror back. The stories in Fourty-Four Turkish Fairy Tales are very long and full of many twists. Unfortunately, I cannot incorporate all of these into my retellings. This story brings in the character who is going to tell the next story, about the Magic Hair Pins. In the next story, she is also the villain. You will see that the audience does not take kindly to her.



Storybook Cover


Kunos, Igancz (1913). Fourty-four Turkish Fairy Tales. The Snake-Peri and the Magic Mirror


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