Surpanakha
on Jerry Springer
Jerry:
Welcome to the show, Surpanakha. I here
you are having trouble with men. A
specific man, Rama. If Rama was here right now, what would you say to
him?
Surpanakha: I would tell him that I love him!
I saw him walking at the edge of the water
and fell in love. I have watched him for
weeks without him knowing. I know I am
the most beautiful demon woman ever, and so I am sure that the next
time he
sees me he will fall in love with me too.
I would ask him to marry me!
Jerry:
Now, Rama has been known to fight rakshasa
demons and kill them. How do you feel
about him murdering your kind? Plus,
what do you think he would say about you being a demon yourself?
Surpanakha: It does not bother me that he fought my
kind. He is a great warrior!
What’s more, I do not think it would matter
that I am a Rakshasi. I would give up
anything to be with him. I will turn
away from the life of a demon if he wishes.
Jerry:
I have a surprise for you, Surpanakha. Rama
has been in backstage listening to what you
have said about him. Let’s bring out
Rama and see what he has to say to Surpanakha’s proposal.
[Rama
enters the stage to applause]
Jerry:
She saw you from afar and fell in love. What
do you have to say to her today?
Rama:
Surpanakha, you are very beautiful, but I
already have a wife who I love very much.
I cannot marry you.
Surpanakha: Is it because I am a demon?
I would give all that up because of you. It
may even help you. You see, my brother is
Ravana, the King of
all Rakshasas. He has unlimited power
and if you marry me he will give you whatever you want.
[She walks over to Rama and sits on his
lap] You know you want me.
Jerry:
Let’s bring out Sita and see what she has to
say about all this.
[Rama
shoves Surpanakha off his lap and she falls onto the floor. He only has eyes for Sita as she walks onto
the stage.]
Jerry:
So, Sita, what do you have to say about
another woman competing for your husband's love?
Sita:
I am not threatened by her. I know
Rama loves me more than anyone. [To
Surpanakha] You seem like a very nice
woman, but Rama is
already married to me. I am not
interested in having a co-wife. So
please go find someone else to fall in love with.
[Sita
is attacks by Surpanakha]
Sita:
Oww!! Let go off me. What did I
ever do to you!! Crazy B*%$#.
Surpanakha: Rama is mine!!
Sita:
Help me, Rama! [Jerry is holding Rama back so
the girls can fight each other.] Lakshmana!
Help me!
[Out of
the crowd jumps Lakshmana. He attacks
Surpanakha in defense of Sita. He cuts
off her nose, ears, and breast. Blood
pours from her wounds.]
Surpanakha: You have mutilated me!!! You have ticked off
the wrong girl. You will pay for
this. Ravana will get you!!!
[Audience
goes wild applauding]
Jerry:
Well, that was an interesting show… I
hope Ravana does not try to get me.
Author’s
Note: In the Ramayana there is a
conflict between the character Surpanakha and Lakshmana.
In the epic version of the story, this scene
takes place in the forest at Panchavati.
This is the area that Rama, Lakshmana, and Sita have decided to
build a
house during Rama’s exile. I have
changed the setting of this conflict has been changed to the stage of
the Jerry
Springer Show. In this retelling,
Surpanakha has not actually proposed to Rama, but only watched him from
afar. This episode takes place right
before Surpanakha is mutilated and before she runs to her brother,
Ravana, for
help. I did not have one main source for
this retelling. I used both William Buck and R.K.
Narayan’s
versions of the story equally. Both
their versions are taken from the very long original of the Ramayana
and both
provided unique details and perspective.
It was important to include the story of Surpanakha, because she
fits
into my theme of women with baggage. Of
all the women in the Ramayana she is one of the most disturbed. It is also important that her brother is
Ravana. This small conflict between
Surpanakha and Lakshmana causes a much bigger conflict to develop
later, as you
already learned from Sita in her appearance on the Oprah show.
Buck, William. Ramayana.
Berkeley: University of California
Press, 1997.
Scene from a Ramayana:
Lakshmana Cuts the Nose of the Demoness Surpanakha. 19th Century.
Opaque
watercolor on paper. India. Gift of Harish K. Patel, S2000.11. Website:
Sackler Freer (Smithsonian)