King Arthur and the
Giant of St. Michael's Mount
by: Matt Seddelmeyer
by: Matt Seddelmeyer
Welcome back to the final episode of King Arthur week! Today on Medieval Mythbusters: King Arthur slays the giant of St. Michael's mount. These and many more myths to come on Medieval Mythbusters. Just who are the Medieval Mythbusters? Sir Adam Savage and Sir Jamie Hyneman both combine for over 30 years of mythbusting experience. They don't just tell the myths; they put them to the test.
“Jamie, I’m really sad King Arthur week will come to a close after today’s myth. There are so many more myths we could test!”
“Yes, Adam. I’m sure we will find many more tales of knights and sorcerers to test. Don’t worry. Plus we are under contract for another season next year.”
“That is right! Let’s just have fun then and blow some things up Medieval Mythbusters style!”
Even though today’s myth has nothing to do with explosives we have a feeling something is going to be blown up.
“Actually, this week’s myth only involves a giant and crushed ribs. Nice try though, Adam. I really wish you would grow up soon. We have real myths to test.”
“All right mister know-it-all! Since you know it all, why don’t you tell us all what this myth is about?”
“Are you done? Ok. As you well know, King Arthur and his army spent most of their years fighting for territory and in defense of their home lands. One day in Brittany, a countryman told King Arthur of a terrible giant. This giant lived on the mountain top known as St. Michael’s Mount. The countryman told King Arthur that for years this giant had been stealing the peasant’s children to satisfy his huge appetite. Even worse, the giant stole the Duchess of Brittany while she was traveling the countryside. King Arthur ordered Sir Bedver and Sir Kay to ready the horses and fetch his harness. The three knights rode off to St. Michael’s Mount, directed by the countryman who first shared with them the news of the Duchess. The giant made his home atop this mount and had two extremely large fires burning at all times. This was what was told to King Arthur by the countryman. Once at the mount King Arthur ascended towards the giant until he came to an elderly woman crying over a fresh grave. She told King Arthur to be quiet because an evil giant lived near and had killed the Duchess who lay in the fresh grave. She said the Duchess, wife of Sir Hoel, Duke of Brittany, was the most beautiful and kind person in the world. King Arthur promised he would rid Brittany of the fear of this giant once and for all and started his ascent to the giant. When he came close to the giant, he saw him eating the leg of a man, while warming the other limbs on one of the fires. Then King Arthur saw three women bound and lying on the ground and felt great compassion for them. He accosted the giant informing him that he had eaten his last meal and should die soon.”
“It’s about time you got to something that isn’t boring!”
“Are you done? A fight ensued between King Arthur and the giant. The giant swung a massive club against King Arthur’s sword. At one point King Arthur sliced through most of the giant’s stomach, but the giant would not stop fighting. The giant supposedly threw down his club and grabbed King Arthur in his massive arms crushing King Arthur’s ribs. They ended up rolling down the mountain while continuing to fight. King Arthur finally killed the giant with his dagger just as they rolled to the feet of Sir Bedver and Sir Kay. Injured, but well alive King Arthur ordered Sir Kay to behead the giant and post the giant’s head on a spear for all to see. A church was built on this same mountain at King Arthur’s request to honor St. Michael. That is the story as I have heard it, but I can’t imagine the giant actually had the strength to crush King Arthur’s ribs. I’m not even sure I believe this so called giant wasn’t simply a large man with severe mental issues.”
“So, I’m guessing we are going to do some crushing of ribs today.”
As usual, the Medieval Mythterns have been working hard to create a testing apparatus for this myth. First Sir Adam and Sir Jamie tried to squeeze a pig's torso in an attempt to break or at least fracture its ribs. As expected. These less than knightly men could not break the pig’s ribs.
“Well, I just don’t think this is possible, Jamie!”
“I’m actually starting to agree with you here. Next we’ll see how much force it would take to break these darn pig ribs.
After a full day's work it was determined that the force necessary to break a man’s ribs by squeezing them was over twice that of an average knight’s strength. So it is looking like they finally busted a myth!
“Well, Jamie. I’m calling this completely busted! We finally did it!”
“Actually, I think this might have been possible depending on the giant’s size. I did a little research and found that the giant’s skeleton was measured and found to be close to one and a half times larger than average men of our time. So I’m saying it is completely plausible that this freak of a giant could have broken King Arthur’s ribs.
“So we agree then. It is officially busted!”
“No! Why don’t you just go blow up those pigs we used today or something?”
"Remember folks, we are what you might call professionals. Please under no circumstances try this at home. Hey Jamie, I bet I can make a bigger pig bomb than you!"
Author’s Note: I told the story of King Arthur and the giant of St. Michael’s Mount with my usual Medieval Mythbuster frametale. I told the story exactly how it was told by Thomas Bulfinch. I used all of the same characters and kept the conversations similar. This story was all found together unlike my Launcelot story which I compiled from various stories of his life. This week’s story was much more easy than the last because it was complete with a setting, characters, and a short and simple story line. I really didn’t have to modify by cutting or expanding any part of the story which was a great change from some of my previous stories. I hope you have enjoyed my stories.